“Want a cookie?”
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“Are you wearing pants under your pants?”
“They stole my face.”
“We’re just doing what beer nerds do.”
“Give me the Calcium Bomb Juice.”
“There’s an actor in every president.”
“You’re a total poser.”
“Clean underwear. Courtesy of my wife.”
“Did you tell it to die?”
“I touched it once. It felt like a fish.”